OUR LIGHTER SIDE “R” Rated 9/30/2016

Written by chuck on September 29, 2016 – 10:30 pm -

litttle-seizures

r-rated


I have a friend that said, “I would like to have a job cleaning mirrors.” I asked him, “Why?” He said, “I could really see myself doing that.”

An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests

Eye Candy

Your wife decides to go out with her friends drinking and dancing….

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An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset.

Upon making several false alarm trips to the bathroom, he decided the latest episode was another and stayed put.

He suddenly filled his bed with diarrhea and was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational.

In a complete loss of composure he jumped out of bed, gathered up the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital window.

A drunk was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him. He started yelling, cursing, and swinging his arms violently trying to get the unknown things off, and ended up with the soiled sheets in a tangled pile at his feet.

As the drunk stood there, unsteady on his feet, staring down at the sheets, a hospital security guard (barely containing his laughter) who had watched the whole incident walked up and asked, “What the heck is going on here?”

The drunk, still staring down replied: “I think I just beat the shit out of a ghost”

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click here

Your wife decides to go out with her friends drinking and dancing….

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Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck

**********************************

DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

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Adult Humor
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Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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OUR LIGHTER SIDE “R” Rated 9/28/2016

Written by chuck on September 27, 2016 – 10:30 pm -

r-rated
not-banging-your-girl-friend

I would like a woman who is honest, unselfish, emotionally stable, loving, constant, and sweet. I have a better chance of being hit by lightning.

I noticed you have a small head

These two poor kids go to a birthday party at a rich kid’s house.

Eye Candy

This guy went into a bar and ordered a beer.
 
He happened to look down the bar and see a man sitting there with a head the size of a cue ball.
 
So he walked down and said to the man, “Excuse me sir, I don’t mean to be rude but I noticed you have a small head. Is this a birth defect?”

The man said “No, I got this in the war.
 
My ship was torpedoed by the Germans in WWII.
 
I was the only survivor on the ship so I swam to shore.
 
One day a mermaid swam up to me and said she would grant me three wishes.
 
For my first wish I wanted to return to the U.S.
 
The mermaid granted that wish.
 
My second wish was to have all the money I would ever need.
 
Wish granted.
 
My third wish was to have sex with the mermaid.
 
She said, ‘I can’t grant that wish because mermaids can’t have sex.’”

So I said, “How about a little head?”

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These two poor kids go to a birthday party at a rich kid’s house. The kid
is so rich that he has his own swimming pool and all the kids go in.

As they’re changing afterwards, one of the poor kids says to the other
one, “Did you notice how small the rich kids’ penises were?”

“Yeah,” says his mate, “It’s probably because they’ve got toys to play with.”

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click here

German Beer Ad

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Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck

**********************************

DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

—————
Adult Humor
—————

Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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OUR LIGHTER SIDE “R” Rated 9/26/2016

Written by chuck on September 25, 2016 – 10:30 pm -

r-rated

You’re living,you occupy space,and you have mass….You know what that means? You matter!

Your Typical Night in Jackson, MS!

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I thought you might find this one interesting!

Did you know that you should remove dust from inside your computer screen?
Every 30 days it is necessary to clean the screen from the inside.
Many people ignore this fact and do not know how to do it.
Manufacturers take advantage of this ignorance to increase their sales of new screens.
To clean the screen from the inside, just click the link and move the mouse.
No need to thank me, I’m just happy to help.

Click here for screen cleaner

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Okay – have no liquids in your mouth as it will be up your nose after watching this video, obviously taken from a smart phone. It’s just a couple of locals resolving a minor disagreement.

00:00
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click here

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Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck

**********************************

DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

—————
Adult Humor
—————

Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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OUR LIGHTER SIDE “R” Rated 9/21/2016

Written by chuck on September 20, 2016 – 10:30 pm -

r-rated

cleaning a table

…and speaking of overcrowding, I read a statistic that a woman gives birth, somewhere in the world, every 4 seconds…
My thinking is that we need to find that woman and make her STOP!…

Eye Candy

Lady taking a shower

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Sexy Lady Taking A Shower

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Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck

**********************************

DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

—————
Adult Humor
—————

Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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OUR LIGHTER SIDE “R” Rated 9/19/2016

Written by chuck on September 18, 2016 – 10:30 pm -

r-rated

stuck-behind-a-horse

Today i’d like to offer you a traditional greeting among my people.
Fuck you and the horse you rode in on.

Eye Candy

Bowling

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Bowling!

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click here

Al Gore was correct

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Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck

**********************************

DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

—————
Adult Humor
—————

Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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OUR LIGHTER SIDE “R” Rated 9/16/2016

Written by chuck on September 15, 2016 – 10:30 pm -

r-rated


Some people say laughter is the best medicine.I like to think that high powered narcotic’s are the best way to go.

Patriotism doesn’t seem to be a shared value any more.

Phone call

Camel Toes

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I can send this to only a few special friends because Patriotism doesn’t seem to be a shared value any more.
 
But every once in a while you see a simple act of patriotism that just fills your heart with so much pride that you get a lump in your throat!

patriotism

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Phone Call
Phone rings, woman answers.
The pervert, with heavy breathing, says,
“I bet you have a tight ass with no hair?
Woman replies, “Yes I do, he’s watching golf –
Who shall I say is calling?”
 

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Camel Toe

00:00
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________________________

click here

Al Gore was correct

________________________


Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck

**********************************

DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

—————
Adult Humor
—————

Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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OUR LIGHTER SIDE “R” Rated 9/14/2016

Written by chuck on September 13, 2016 – 10:30 pm -

r-rated

If Cinderella’s shoe fit perfectly, Why did it fall off in the first place?

Hillary Clinton was recently invited to speak

She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk.

Put-This-Alarm-Clock-In-Your-Vagina-And-Wake-Up-To-An-Orgasm

Eye Candy

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Hillary Clinton was recently invited to speak in front of a major gathering of the American Indian Nation in upstate New York. She spoke for nearly an hour about her plans for increasing every Native American’s standard of living.
She talked about her experience as a U.S. Senator and how she had voted for every Native American issue that came to the floor of the Senate. Despite Hillary being vague about the details of her plans, she seemed enthusiastic and spoke eloquently about her ideas for helping her “red sisters and brothers”.

At the end of her speech, the Tribes presented Hillary with a plaque inscribed with her new Indian name, “Walking Eagle.”

Honored and happy with how everything went, Hillary then left to go to a fund raiser, smiling and waving to the crowd from her motorcade.

A news reporter later asked the group of chiefs how they came to choose the new name they had given to Mrs. Clinton.
They explained that “Walking Eagle” is the name given to an old bird so full of shit it can no longer fly.

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A blonde heard that baths in milk would make her beautiful. She left a
note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk.

When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake.
He thought she probably meant 2.5 gallons. So he knocked on the door to
clarify the point.

The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, “I found your note
asking me to leave 25 gallons of milk. Did you mean 2.5 gallons?”
The blonde said, “No, I want 25 gallons. I’m going to fill my bathtub
up with milk and take a milk bath so I can look young and beautiful again.”

The milkman asked, “Do you want it pasteurized?”
Wait for it …
Wait for it …
The blonde said, “No, just up to my tits … I can splash it on my eyes
if I need to!”

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click here
Clit-o-Clock WARNING!

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Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck

**********************************

DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

—————
Adult Humor
—————

Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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OUR LIGHTER SIDE “R” Rated 9/12/2016

Written by chuck on September 11, 2016 – 10:30 pm -

r-rated

I have finished my research into the effect alcohol has on physical movement. The results were staggering.

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A beautiful woman loved growing a garden, but couldn’t seem to get her tomatoes to turn red.
One day, while taking a stroll, she came upon a gentleman neighbor who had the most beautiful garden full of huge red tomatoes.
The woman asked the gentleman, “What do you do to get your tomatoes so red?”

The gentleman responded, “Well, twice a day I stand in front of my tomato garden and expose myself, and my tomatoes turn red from blushing so much.”

Well, the woman was so impressed that she decided to try doing the same thing to her tomato garden to see if it would work. Twice a day, for two weeks, she exposed herself to her garden hoping for the best.

One day the gentleman was passing by and asked the woman, “By the way, how did you make out? Did your tomatoes turn red?”

“No”, she replied, “but my cucumber are enormous.”

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ABDULLAH IN THE NURSING HOME
 
An Arab family was considering putting their grandfather Abdullah in a nursing home.  All the Arab Facilities were completely full, so they had to put him in an Italian home.  After a few weeks in the Italian facility, they came to visit Grandpa. 
 
How do you like it here?” asked the grandson”

It’s wonderful! Everyone here is so courteous and respectful,” said grandpa.

“We’re so happy for you. We were worried that this was the wrong place for you, since you are a little different from everyone.”
 
“Oh, no! Let me tell you about how wonderfully they treat the residents,” Abdullah said with a big smile. “There’s a musician here – he’s 85 years old. He hasn’t played the violin in 20 years, and everyone still calls him Maestro! 

There is a judge in here – he’s 95 year old. He hasn’t been on the bench in 30 years and everyone still calls him Your Honor. 

There’s a dentist here – 90 years old. He hasn’t fixed a tooth for 25 years, and everyone still calls him Doctor! 

And Me – I haven’t had sex for 35 years,  and they still call me The Fucking Arab.
 

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click here

Walking Dead Puppy Edition This is “G” rated!

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Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck

**********************************

DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

—————
Adult Humor
—————

Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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Written by chuck on September 1, 2016 – 10:30 pm -

r-rated

sexy lady


A US Marine enters the Catholic Church confessional booth in Hendersonville, NC
He tells the priest, “Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.
Last night, I beat the ever-living crap out of a flag burning, cop hating, Obama loving protester.”
The priest says, “My son, I’am here to forgive your sins, not to discuss your community service.”

30 THINGS YOU’LL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY.

Barack Obama, at a recent rural elementary school assembly

Pointers

Bass Fishing

Hidden camera social experiment proves most people are heep

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30 THINGS YOU’LL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY.

30. Oh I just couldn’t – she’s only sixteen.
29. I’ll take Shakespeare for $1000, Alex.
28. Duct tape won’t fix that.
27. Come to think of it, I’ll have a Heineken.
26. We don’t keep firearms in this house.
25. You can’t feed that to the dog.
24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it’s just not safe.
23. Wrestling’s fake.
22. We’re vegetarians.
21. Do you think my gut is too big?
20. I’ll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.
19. Honey, we don’t need another dog.
18. Who gives a damn about who won the Civil War?
17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.
15. I just couldn’t find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
14. Trim the fat off that steak.
13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.
12. The tires on that truck are too big.
11. I’ve got it all on the C: drive.
10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.
09. My fiancé, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany’s
08. I’ve got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.
07. Checkmate.
06. She’s too young to be wearing a bikini.
05. Hey, here’s an episode of “Hee Haw” that we haven’t seen.
04. I don’t have a favorite college team.
03. You All.
02. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Betty Mae.
And the #1 thing you never hear a Southern Boy say:
01. Nope, no more Jack Daniels for me. I’m driving.

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Barack Obama, at a recent rural elementary school assembly in South Texas, asked the audience for total quiet.

Then, in the silence, he started to slowly clap his hands once every few seconds, holding the audience in total silence.

Then he said into the microphone, ‘Children, every time I clap my hands together, a child in America dies from gun violence.’

Then, little 10 year old Darrell, with a proud Texas drawl, pierced the quiet and said: “Well, dumb ass, stop clapping!”

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I am only too happy to sometimes offer you useful pointers. Isn’t that what friends are for ???

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click here

When I finally retired, I could hardly wait to spend time enjoying my favorite pastime — bass fishing.

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click here

Hidden camera social experiment proves most people are heep

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Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck

**********************************

DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

—————
Adult Humor
—————

Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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OUR LIGHTER SIDE “R” Rated 8/29/2016

Written by chuck on August 28, 2016 – 10:30 pm -

r-rated

men smarter during  sex

Questions

Cartoons

Eye Candy

“Gun Free Zone” is just another way of saying “Crime Friendly Zone”

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Question: Why is the “69” position also called the “smokers’ position?”
Answer:   Because while she is smoking the cigar, he is cleaning the ashtray.
  
Question: Why is sperm donation more expensive than blood donation?
Answer:   Because it’s HANDMADE!!

An old man married a young girl. On the wedding night he showed five fingers to his wife.
Young girl : Ooh.. darling!  5 times?
Old man    : No dear, choose which one you prefer to start with.

Man 1  : My wife is obsessed with cars. While asleep, she holds my bird & says “1st gear, 2nd gear…”.
Man 2  : My wife is worse, she puts my bird inside her and says “Full Tank Please”.

Question: What is the closest thing similar to a woman’s period?
Answer  : Your salary, it comes once a month, lasts about 5-7 days & if it doesn’t come, it means you are in big trouble.

2 prostitutes (Bitches) were in a taxi, on their way home after “work”.
Bitch 1 :  I smell sperm!
Bitch 2 :  Sorry, I burped!!!

A woman gave birth to 6 babies & seeing this, she immediately got out of hospital, slapped her husband & shouted,
“I told you not to go doggy style!”

A prostitute goes to deposit a $100 bill in a bank.
The teller says, “Sorry, madam, the note is a fake”.
“Oh no!” exclaimed the prostitute, “I have been… raped!!”.

Reporter: Your secretary said publicly that you have a small penis, would you care to comment on this?
Man: “The truth is that she has a big mouth!”

A Japanese girl accidentally lets out a big fart after making love.
She said, “Aww, so solly… exkooz me pleazo, Flont hole so happy, back hole laugh out loud”.

 
What is common between a swimming pool and a wife?
For both, we pay high maintenance for the little time we spend in them.

Love is a complicated piece of machinery.
Sometimes, all you need is a good screw to fix it.

Sex is like a card game. If you don’t have a good partner, you better have a good hand.

What’s the difference between biology and sociology?
When the baby looks like his dad or mom, then it is biology.
When the baby looks like the neighbor, then it is sociology.

Whoever first said that “A dog is man’s best friend” has never seen a pussy before.

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doge style

slow drivers look stupid

play the flute

right person

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eye candy

nice ass

we have spell check

very sexy

tug-life-5

tug-life-0

________________________

click here

“Gun Free Zone” is just another way of saying “Crime Friendly Zone”

________________________


Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck

**********************************

DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

—————
Adult Humor
—————

Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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