Just a few jokes 8/4/2017

Written by chuck on August 4, 2017 – 9:09 am -

So you have a super hot naked woman next to you in bed, and a gay guy on the other-side of you…
Who do you turn your back on?

This will be the LAST MESSAGE ABOUT OUR DOG – DON’T BOTHER US ANYMORE.

IN RESPONSE TO ALL THE RECENT E-MAILS ABOUT OUR DOG, PLEASE BE ADVISED, WE ARE SICK AND TIRED OF ANSWERING QUESTIONS ABOUT HIM.

YES, HE BIT SIX PEOPLE WEARING OBAMA T-SHIRTS, FOUR PEOPLE WEARING HILLARY T-SHIRTS, TWO CAR DRIVERS WITH RAP MUSIC BLARING FROM THEIR VEHICLES, NINE TEENAGERS WITH PANTS HANGING PAST THEIR BUTT CRACKS, THREE FLAG BURNERS, AND AN ILLEGAL TAXI DRIVER.

FOR THE LAST TIME. . .THE DOG IS NOT FOR SALE!

AND NO, I DON’T APPROVE OF HIS SMOKING, BUT HE SAYS IT HELPS GET THE “BAD TASTE” OUT OF HIS MOUTH!


Don’t go broke trying
to look rich,
act your wage.

Guy in a bar with his dog.
 
Bartender says to take the dog outside. Guy says the dog can talk and would like to prove it. Bartender concedes.

Guy: How does sandpaper feel?

Dog: rough

Guy: What’s on top of a house?

Dog: roof

Guy: Who was the greatest baseball player of all time?

Dog: Ruth

Bartender: Okay. That’s enough. Take your stupid dog somewhere else.

Dog: So who was it? DiMaggio?

An Engineer dies and goes to Hell. Dissatisfied with the level of comfort,
he starts designing and building improvements. After a while, Hell has
air conditioning, flush toilets and escalators. The Engineer is a pretty popular guy.
One-day God calls and asks Satan, “So, how’s it going down there?”

Satan says, “Hey things are going great. We’ve got air conditioning and flush toilets
and escalators, and there’s no telling what this Engineer is going to come up with next.”
God is horrified. “What? You’ve got an Engineer? That’s a mistake – he should never
have gone down there! You know all Engineers go to Heaven. Send him up here! ”
Satan says, “No way. I like having an Engineer on the staff. I’m keeping him.”
God says, “Send him up here or I’ll sue.”
“Yeah, right,” Satan laughs, “and where are you going to get a lawyer?”

click here

Terrible experience with a prostitute


Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck


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