Just a few jokes 8/3/2017

Written by chuck on August 2, 2017 – 10:30 pm -

I am so mad right now. I went to Walmart for some stuff & at checkout I dropped a $20. A woman in front of me picked it up. I thanked her & told her it was mine.

She said the things found on earth are kept by the collector,” & walked away. I looked at the cashier, like you seeing this & in a loud voice I said, “That’s a new one to me” & I held out my hand for her to give me my $20, as she trying to leave.

I end up following her into the parking lot, but she was clearly trying… to get away from my ass…When she got to her car she put her bags on the ground to open her car door, and I ran up, grabbed the bags, & took off to the car, while shouting, “The things found on earth are kept by the collector!”

I drove home nervous & angry at the same time because I took this thiefs stuff and she look like the cop calling sorts. . I opened the bags & what did I find inside? Prime ribs, Lobsters & about $200 dollars worth of meat. Not bad for being angry over a $20 dollar bill huh?

Sources in California say that radical Muslims
are planning to kill every U.S. citizen in Los Angeles.
Police officials fear the death toll could be as high as 9.

California produces three
things in huge quantities:

Yet, all three are either nuts, or fruits.

You Sound Like My Ex

After the honeymoon, the new wife tells her husband, “I think it’s time for you to stop playing golf. In fact, you might as well sell all of your clubs.”
The husband replies, “You’re starting to sound like my ex-wife.”

His wife says, “I thought you said you’ve never been married before?”
The husband says, “I haven’t.”

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