Just a few jokes 7/12/2017

Written by chuck on July 11, 2017 – 10:30 pm -

Political Science Class
Politics
I TOLD MY SON, “YOU WILL MARRY THE GIRL I CHOOSE”
HE SAID, “NO.”
I TOLD HIM ” SHE IS BILL GATE’S DAUGHTER”
HE SAID, “YES.”
I CALLED BILL GATES AND SAID, “I WANT YOUR DAUGHTER TO MARRY MY SON.”
BILL GATES SAID, “NO.”
I TOLD BILL GATES, “MY SON IS THE CEO OF THE WORLD BANK.”
BILL GATES SAID, “OK.”
I CALLED THE PRESIDENT OF WORLD BANK AND ASKED HIM TO MAKE MY SON THE CEO.
HE SAID, “NO.”
I TOLD HIM, “MY SON IS BILL GATES’S SON-IN-LAW.”
HE SAID, “OK.”
THIS IS EXACTLY HOW POLITICS WORKS.

My wife and I went to the Calgary Bull Sale & Agricultural Show and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said,
‘THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR’
My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs ……smiled and said, ‘He mated 50 times last year, that’s almost once a week.’
We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said, 
”THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR’
My wife gave me a healthy jab and said, ‘WOW~~That’s more than twice a week ! ………..You could learn a lot from him.’
We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said, in capital letters, 
‘THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR
‘My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said, 
‘That’s once a day ..You could REALLY learn something from this one.’
I looked at her and said, 
‘Go over and ask him if every time was with the same old cow.’
My condition has been upgraded from critical to stable and I should eventually make a full recovery.

Rodney Dangerfield: I tell you I get no respect…..When I was in High School, I called my girlfriend one night and she said in her most sexy voice….”Come on over to the house, there’s nobody home.” I went over there to see her and rang the doorbell, there was nobody home. And now, I still don’t get respect. I didn’t get a friend request from Jayden Smith!


Please share my blog with your friends.

Thanks,

Chuck


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