Would you do this?

Written by chuck on February 28, 2015 – 12:07 pm -

Scroll to the 2.50 second mark.

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Bullet stopped by Water Balloons

Written by chuck on February 27, 2015 – 4:08 pm -



How many water balloons does it take to stop a bullet blasting out of a 44 Magnum?


How Many Water Balloons It Takes to Stop a Bullet Blasting out of a 44 Magnum

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Post Turtle and then a few more jokes

Written by chuck on February 27, 2015 – 1:18 pm -

unveiling obama statue ols-2-26-15

Are you irritated when people come down on our police officers?

The Post Turtle

A group of women were at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with your husband.

Terrorists have kidnapped the entire US Congress

More opportunities

Ass Study

A pickup truck with a dog sitting behind the wheel


120105~3

Are you irritated when people come down on our police officers, saying that they don’t care about or respect others?  Well, here is a story that clearly shows not all cops are in that category.

This story involves the police department in   the small town of Columbus , Nebraska who reported finding a man’s body last Saturday in the early evening in the Platte River near the State Highway-30 bridge.  The dead man’s  name would not be released until his family   had been notified.

The victim apparently drowned due to  excessive beer consumption while visiting “someone” in Central City.  He was wearing black fishnet stockings, 6 inch spiked heels, a red garter belt, a pink G-string, purple lipstick dazzle dust on his eyelids, 2 1/2 inch false eyelashes and an Obama T-shirt. 

The Columbus police removed the Obama T-shirt to spare his family any unnecessary embarrassment.

So there, police do care.


120105~3

The Post Turtle

While stitching a cut on the hand of a 75 year old farmer, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man. Eventually the topic got around to politicians and their role as our leaders.

The old rancher said “Well, as I see it, most politicians are ‘Post Turtles’.”

Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what a ‘post turtle’ was.

The old rancher said “When you’re driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that’s a post turtle.”

The old farmer saw the puzzled look on the doctor’s face so he continued to explain. “You know he didn’t get up there by himself, he doesn’t belong up there, he doesn’t know what to do while he’s up there, he’s elevated beyond his ability to function and you? just wonder what kind of dumb ass put him up there to begin with.”

Best description of a Obama I’ve ever seen and the voters who put them up there.


120105~3

A group of women were at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with your husband.

The women were asked, “How many of you love your husband?”

All the women raised their hands.

Then they were asked, “When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?”

Some women answered today, some yesterday, some couldn’t remember.

The women were then told to take out their cell phones and text their husband: “I love you, sweetheart.”

The women were then told to exchange phones and to read aloud the text message responses.

Here are some of the replies:

1. Who is this?

2. Eh, mother of my children, are you sick?

3. I love you too.

4. What now? Did you crash the car again?

5. I don’t understand what you mean?

6. What did you do now?

7. ?!?

8. Don’t beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need?

9. Am I dreaming?

10. If you don’t tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die.

11. I thought we agreed we would not drink during the day.

12. Your mother is coming to stay, isn’t she??


120105~3

A driver was stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington, DC.
Nothing was moving.

Suddenly, a man knocks on the window.

The driver rolls down the window and asks, “What’s going on?”

“Terrorists have kidnapped the entire US Congress, and they’re asking for a $100 million dollar ransom. Otherwise, they are going to douse them all in gasoline and set them on fire. We are going from car to car, collecting donations.”

“How much is everyone giving, on an average?” the driver asks.
The man replies, “Roughly a gallon


120105~3

more opportunities


120105~3

ass-study ols-2-26-15


120105~3

As I drove into a parking lot, I noticed that a pickup truck with a dog sitting behind the wheel was rolling toward a female pedestrian.

She seemed oblivious, so I hit my horn to get her attention. She looked up just in time to jump out of the way of the truck’s path, and the vehicle bumped harmlessly into the curb and stopped.

I rushed to the woman’s side to see if she was all right. “I’m fine,” she assured me, “but I hate to think what could have happened to me if that dog hadn’t honked…”

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An Employee Of Golden Corral Got Terminated After He Went Public And Exposed This DISGUSTING Reality

Written by chuck on February 27, 2015 – 8:41 am -

Terresa Monroe-Hamilton
25 Feb, 2015 by Terresa Monroe-Hamilton

It took a lot of guts to do what this young man did. They also offered him 20k in hush money. Fabulous. The proof in my opinion here is that the restaurant was shut down three days after this hit social media. As an added tip to us by what we assume was the whistleblower, the manager was transferred to another restaurant location. Josh Phillips, the former employee and whistleblower, has also gone on Outlaw Radio in LA to do an interview to expose Golden Corral over this. The guy seems like he just wants to do the right thing. I mean his biggest dream is to dance with Ellen DeGeneres. This is not a guy who is just going out to snare someone for wrong-doing… I believe he really cares. What’s more, when I was starting out, I saw various restaurants do similar things. I reported one of them to the state for non-payment and health issues as well. That didn’t set well with them. What got me was how they bleached lettuce to keep serving it long after it went brown. Think about that.

Note: The WorkFit for AppleSharpen your creativity Strengthen your body is an ad, scroll down for the video for Golden Corral.

Click to read more and see video.

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The Ultimate Golf FAIL Compilation

Written by chuck on February 27, 2015 – 8:28 am -

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How NOT to kill a snake!

Written by chuck on February 27, 2015 – 8:10 am -

NT woman lights fire to scare snake, burns down caravan!

A plan devised after a few “cold drinks” to drive a snake out of a caravan has not ended well at property in Darwin’s rural area.

A woman living in the caravan called snake catchers to the Berry Springs location on Wednesday afternoon to catch what she said was a large brown snake.

Police Duty Superintendent Del Jones said reptile wranglers were unable to corral the culprit.

“The snake people attended and, unfortunately, they couldn’t get the snake,” Supt Jones said.

The woman then took matters into her own hands, but not before some refreshment.

Click here to read more and see photo.

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OUR LIGHTER SIDE 2/27/2015

Written by chuck on February 26, 2015 – 10:30 pm -

r-rated


“Whatever path that you take in your life, you must always find time to give something back. Give something back to your community, give something back to your state or your country. Reaching out and helping people will bring you more satisfaction than everything else you’ve ever done!” -Arnold Schwarzenegger

Boobs

I don’t give a shit how terrorists are treated

Fucking Moron

Meet my Yoga Instructor
Read more »


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OUR LIGHTER SIDE 2/26/2015

Written by chuck on February 25, 2015 – 10:30 pm -

this is not for beginners fb 2-24-15 ols-2-26-15
r-rated


Chicago is freezing. It’s so bad, gang members are sitting at home and texting each other pictures of bullets.

He’s never been with a hooker before …

Golf tip

How to recognize a woman with explosives

Art of sneezing

Read more »


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OUR LIGHTER SIDE 2/25/2015

Written by chuck on February 24, 2015 – 10:30 pm -

eve that is not a salad

my water broke

r-rated

Did you see the movie about the hot dog?
It was an Oscar Wiener.

One Man’s Perfect Day

Naval Sensitivity Training

Just a few more jokes!

Be Very Careful With E-Bay!!

New Safety Air Bags

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One Man’s Perfect Day

6:00 Alarm

6:15 Blow job

6:30 Massive, satisfying dump while reading the sports section

7:00 Breakfast – steak and eggs, coffee and toast – all cooked by naked, buxom wench who bends over a lot.

7:30 Limo arrives

7:45 Couple of ice-cold beers en route to the airport

9:15 Flight in personal Lear jet – finest Scotch served in Baccarat crystal sniffer while receiving blow job from green-eyed redhead with huge tits

9:30 Limo to Augusta National Golf Club

9:45 Play front nine (2 under par)
?
11:45 Lunch  -steak and lobster, couple of ice-cold beers and bottle of Dom Peringon

12:15 Blow job

12:30 Play back nine (4 under)

2:15 Limo back to airport (several bourbons)

2:30 Fly to Bahamas

3:30 Late afternoon fishing expedition with all-female crew, all nude who also bend over a lot

4:30 Land world record Marlin (1234lbs)-on light tackle

5:00 Fly home, massage and hand job by naked Elle Macpherson

6:45 Shit, shower and shave

7:00 Watch news – Al Sharpton assassinated

7:30 Dinner – lobster appetizers, Dom Peringon (1953), big juicy fillet steak followed by ice cream served on a big pair of tits

9:30 Sex with three women, all with lesbian tendencies

11:00 Massage and Jacuzzi with tasty pizza snacks and a cleansing ice-cold beer

11:30 Night-cap – blow job

11:35 Obama resigns

11:45 In bed alone

11:50 A 22-second fart which changes note 4 times and forces the dog to leave the room

11:51 Laugh yourself to sleep…

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Request: If you order from Amazon, please use the link on my main page. This helps supports my blog and Eye-Candy! Thanks… Chuck

Please tell your friends about Chuck’s blog and OLS
________________________

Naval Sensitivity Training

*A young Naval Officer was in a terrible car accident, but due to the
heroics of the hospital staff the only permanent injury was the loss of one
ear. Since he wasn’t physically impaired he remained in the military and
eventually became an Admiral. However, during his career he was always
sensitive about his appearance.*

*One day the Admiral was interviewing two Navy Master Chiefs and a Marine
Sergeant Major for his personal staff*

*The first Master Chief was a Surface Navy type and it was a great
interview. At the end of the interview the Admiral asked him, “Do you
notice anything different about me?”*

*The Master Chief answered, “Why yes. I couldn’t help but notice you are
missing your starboard ear, so I don’t know whether this impacts your
hearing on that side.”*

*The Admiral got very angry at this lack of tact and threw him out of his
office.*

*The next candidate, an Aviation Master Chief, when asked this same
question, answered, “Well yes, you seem to be short one ear.”*

*The Admiral threw him out also.*

*The third interview was with the Marine Sergeant Major. He was
articulate, extremely sharp, and seemed to know more than the two Master
Chiefs put together. The Admiral wanted this guy, but went ahead with the
same question.*

*”Do you notice anything different about me?”*

*To his surprise the Sergeant Major said, “Yes. You wear contact lenses.”*

*The Admiral was impressed and thought to himself, what an incredibly
tactful Marine. “And how do you know that?” the Admiral asked.*

*The Sergeant Major replied, “Well sir, it’s pretty hard to wear glasses
with only one fuckin’ ear.”
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click here

Just a few more jokes!

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Be Very Careful With E-Bay!!

PLEASE BE AWARE AND TAKE NOTE THAT NOT ALL E-BAY TRADERS ARE DELIVERING GOODS AS ADVERTISED.

I HAVE BEEN SCAMMED!!

I ordered a blow up doll, and take a look at what they sent me!

blow up doll


New Safety Air Bags

New Safety Air Bags

click here


AdamEveToys.com

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DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

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Adult Humor
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Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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OUR LIGHTER SIDE 2/24/2015

Written by chuck on February 23, 2015 – 10:30 pm -

blinker fluid fb 2-22-15 ols 2-24-15

r-rated


What amazes one even more than the ignorance of the President is that he has managed to surround himself with a staff that is just as clueless.

‘Tarzan not know sex’ he replied.

Do you know if it will fit in a small block Chevy V-8?

After you have sex with a white woman that your eyes burn

Eye Candy Can you tell who is the mother and who is the daughter

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When Jane initially met Tarzan in the jungle, she was attracted to him, and during her questions about his life, she asked him how he had sex?

‘Tarzan not know sex’ he replied.

Jane explained to him what sex was.

Tarzan said ….Tarzan use knot hole in trunk of tree.’
Horrified Jane said, ‘Tarzan you have it all wrong, but I will show you how to
do it properly.’

She took off her clothing and laid down on the ground.

‘Here’ she said, pointing to her privates, ‘you must put it in here.’

Tarzan removed his loin cloth, showing Jane his considerable manhood, stepped
closer to her and kicked her in the crotch!

Jane rolled around in agony for what seemed like an eternity.

Eventually she managed to grasp for air and screamed ‘What did you do that for?’
Tarzan replied, ‘Check for squirrel.’

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Do any of you old hot rod guys recognize this carburetor?
Do you know if it will fit in a small block Chevy V-8?
carburetor question

________________________

Request: If you order from Amazon, please use the link on my main page. This helps supports my blog and Eye-Candy! Thanks… Chuck

Please tell your friends about Chuck’s blog and OLS
________________________

Two black guys were in a bar talking, and one says to the other, “You ever
notice after you have sex with a white woman that your eyes burn, your nose
burns and you get all teary-eyed?”

The second black guy says,
“Yeah, all the time.”

The first one asked, “Why is

that?”

The second says, “I’m pretty
sure it’s the pepper spray.”

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daughter_mother005

daughter_mother004

daughter_mother003

daughter_mother002

daughter_mother001

daughter_mother010

daughter_mother009

daughter_mother008

daughter_mother007

daughter_mother006

________________________

click here


AdamEveToys.com

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DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

—————
Adult Humor
—————

Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Send Jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


Posted in Ourlighterside - R rated | Comments Off on OUR LIGHTER SIDE 2/24/2015