OUR LIGHTER SIDE 5/1/2014

Written by chuck on April 30, 2014 – 10:30 pm -

As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind
– every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder.
~ John Glenn?

Can’t find the book you are looking for?

This could be use, if …

Your diaper is full

Teach a man to fish …

Eye Candy

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Please tell your friends about Chuck’s blog and OLS
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DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this post. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

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Adult Humor
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Thanks for reading OLS and Chuck’s blog.

Please tell your friends about OLS!

Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Please send jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck
Birmingham, Alabama


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Ultimate Workers Fail Compilation 2013

Written by chuck on April 30, 2014 – 11:32 am -


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Truth be told!

Written by chuck on April 30, 2014 – 11:20 am -

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Tolerance

Written by chuck on April 30, 2014 – 9:44 am -


Yes, I am posting this on the Serious Side.
I am serious, we should do this!

A broadcaster speaking in Sydney, says, “I am truly perplexed that so many of my friends are against another mosque being built in Sydney.

I think it should be the goal of every Aussie to be tolerant regardless of their religious beliefs. Thus the mosque should be allowed, in an effort to promote tolerance.

That is why I also propose that two nightclubs be opened next door to the mosque, thereby promoting tolerance from within the mosque. We could call one of the clubs, which would be gay, “The Turban Cowboy “, and the other a topless bar called “You Mecca Me Hot.

Next door should be a butcher shop that specializes in pork, and adjacent to that an open-pit barbecue pork restaurant, called “Iraq o’ Ribs.”

Across the street there could be a lingerie store called “Victoria Keeps Nothing Secret “, with sexy mannequins in the window modeling the goods

Next door to the lingerie shop there would be room for an adult sex toy shop, “Koranal Knowledge “, its name in flashing neon lights, and on the other side a liquor store called “Morehammered.

All of this would encourage Muslims to demonstrate the tolerance they demand of us, so their mosque issue would not be a problem for others.”

Yes we should promote tolerance, and you can do your part by passing this on.


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Honest Real Estate Ad!

Written by chuck on April 30, 2014 – 8:31 am -

Anyone who has ever dealt with a real estate agent knows some of their
statements are a little creative, such as paint up, fix up = 3 walls
still standing; handy man special = 2 walls standing and maybe a floor
intact; and fixer-upper, = mostly a pile of loose rotted boards, but
this is the most truthful real estate sales sign I have ever seen.

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OUR LIGHTER SIDE 4/30/2014

Written by chuck on April 29, 2014 – 10:30 pm -


Did you know:

It’s impossible to sneeze
with your eyes open.

Abbott & Costello Common Core math skills

I found a prostitute who charges by the inch.

I am not sure if these are 44’s or a 45????

Ladies Fishing Eye Candy

Read more »


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How To Use A Condom, After The Age Of Fifty!

Written by chuck on April 29, 2014 – 12:33 pm -


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Drunk Helicopter Pilot Prank

Written by chuck on April 29, 2014 – 12:10 pm -


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What should I do to marry a rich guy?

Written by chuck on April 29, 2014 – 9:37 am -

A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:

Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?

I’m going to be honest of what I’m going to say here. I’m 25 this year. I’m very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I’m greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married? I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you? Among those I’ve dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York CityGarden(? ), $250k annual income is not enough.

I’m here humbly to ask a few questions:

1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)

2) Which age group should I target?

3) Why most wives of the riches is only average-looking? I’ve met a few girls who doesn’t have looks & are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys

4) How do you decide who can be your wife, & who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)

Ms. Pretty

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Awesome reply:

Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyze your situation as a professional investor. My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I’m not wasting time here. From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain. Put the details aside, what you’re trying to do is an exchange of “beauty” and “money”: Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square. However, there’s a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can’t be prettier year after year. Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It’s not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worried 10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a “trading position”. If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term – same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or “leased”. Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income.. This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in “leasing” services, do contact me…

Signed,

CEO J.P. Morgan


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Roy Rogers Quick Trigger Shooter Hat: Vintage Toy

Written by chuck on April 29, 2014 – 9:15 am -

I am so young, I do not remember this commercial!


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