OUR LIGHTER SIDE 6/28/2011

Written by chuck on June 27, 2011 – 10:30 pm -

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Green spots

The recession hits everybody

Anti-carjacking device

A young woman goes to her doctor’s office, afraid of the strange development on the inside of her thighs . . . a green spot on the inside of each. “They won’t
wash off, they won’t scrape off and they seem to be getting worse.”

The doctor assures her he’ll get to the bottom of the problem, and tells her not
to worry until the tests come back.

A few days later, the woman’s phone rings. Much to her relief, it’s the doctor.
She immediately begs to know what’s causing the spots.

The doctor says, “You’re perfectly healthy – – there’s no problem. But I’m
wondering, is your boyfriend a Harley guy?” The woman stammers, “Why, yes, but
how did you know?”

“Tell him his earrings aren’t real gold.”
________________________

The recession hits everybody

I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

Wives are sleeping with their husbands because they can’t afford batteries.

CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.

Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

A stripper was killed when her audience showered
her with rolls of pennies while she danced.

I saw a Mormon polygamist with only one wife.

If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,”
you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America .

Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.

My cousin had an exorcism but couldn’t afford to pay for it,
and they re-possessed her

A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico .

A picture is now only worth 200 words.

When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.

The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.

Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal.
Oh Great! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!

And, finally…

I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs,
my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the
Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan , and when I told them
I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.

________________________

Please tell your friends about Chuck’s blog and OLS
________________________

Anti-carjacking device

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DISCLAIMER! There may be errors in this newsletter. Any errors or “typos” you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out. As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can’t spell a word more than one way.

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Adult Humor
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Our Lighter side is an electronic newsletter published five days a week and sent to you from Birmingham, AL.

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Send them this address http://www.ourlighterside.com

Please send jokes and stuff to: ols@ourlighterside.com

Thanks,

Chuck


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